Firm

I have two jobs here: provide the eye candy and to regale you with drinking stories(not been many of those lately).

Sexbox one set up. And I've stolen my brothers pip-boy.

I'm still alive.

At Nottingham's Oktoberfest. Big tent, bigger beer.

....you lot. With all your lovely, mouth-watering well prepared food...I will learn to cook. It will not be this night. Fuckin' chips 'n egg init.

Reunited. I went for absolute '80s. They played: Huey and News, Matthew Wilde and Robert Palmer. Had a fuckin' rave. Also, shower beers is the best thing ever! Yes, I realise I look like a cunt should have worn my sunglasses...

Car. The Type R

I am a fucking handsome bastard.

"I was only helping it over the fence, officer".

Toby Carvery breakfast buffet. I'll have 9 pieces of bacon, three sausages, three fried eggs, scrambled eggs, mushrooms, tomatoes, two hash browns. Then smother the lot in beans.

Yesterday. Bothering sheep. Again.

Yeah. Pretty much. My dad was a landscape gardener. He gave me a bit of advice. I used to do a bit of work for him/help out when I was a teenager. I sorta know what I'm doing.

I've got a pond. Goldfish and shubunkins. I did have some koi carp. Unfortunately they died, pretty severe winter some years ago. Pretty flowers.

God, Krishna whoever. Don't let this end in a draw. I can't stand boredom. If it ends in a draw I'm going to rape the landlord, stab a kid and set the gaff on fire. Sort it out Forest,

Yes! I finally get my way. We're not going to the chuffing zoo. We're going to the parish to watch Nottingham Forest. Bear witness. I am triumphant.

Hedgehog in my garden this morning. I've not seen one for years. I put some water out for it so it's been hanging around. Delightful critter. I've named it Clive...

I'm going to keep the monkey one. I'll use it as some sort of flash card. Anybody asks me to do something I don't want to do. Well, they're getting the monkey finger....

Birthday love from work. The bag contains alcohol. Which I'll be drinking throughout the shift.

A captivating look at British politics and the hypocrisy of the supposed elite who run this country. An infuriating yet important read.

A face only a fist could love...Off to Liverpool to show those silly scousers how we 'ave it in the Midlands. Gives no shits, gave no worries, get the fuckin' beers in...

Cans of Red Stripe? *approves*

I think it's now just me and the children who are not bearded...scruffs. Look new specs.

Few from Splendour. Batman's house Before the Specials

Lol. He's at it again. From football last Sunday. 'Dem aerial challenges.

Hangover cure recipe: sunglasses, beer garden, 10 cigarettes, 11 pints, 38 pisses and two big shits...jobs a good 'un.