ViceMan

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Status Updates posted by ViceMan

  1. Where have all the noobs gone? Hey look, Tommy Vercetti and CJ have sex in GTA V and then Claude enters the room, stares at them briefly and joins in. Also, fingerless gloves!

    1. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      Claude would be the sub obviously.

  2. Well this is it, we are in the final hour. Many fantasies will be fulfilled in the next 50 minutes, and many more will be left shattered, broken, raped and unfulfilled at the wayside as the screaming hordes of GTA fans run past with their erect penises held high in the air. See you all on the other side for tea and biscuits.

  3. Time to watch a few DVDs to while away the hours before the trailer release, i'm thinking For A Few Dollars More followed by The Good the Bad and the Ugly.

    1. Indy

      Indy

      I watched Return of the King Extended Blu-ray (4hrs+)

    2. Firm

      Firm

      Lucky cunts. I've got work to keep me occupied.

  4. Trick or muthafuckin' treat nigguh?!

  5. All these new faces, all the more faces for Massacre to remove and staple to his bedroom wall.

    1. DuffMan

      DuffMan

      Warlord... Floorboard...

    2. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      Ok I get it now that you've explained it.

    3. Massacre

      Massacre

      Warlord - Floorboard? Nigga, you weird. You did that in the Gears of War topic, too.

    4. Show next comments  9 more
  6. Playing some old Megadrive games from my childhood; Mega Lo Mania, Flashback etc. I know you cunts don't care but yeah, whatever... Fuck you anyway. Stop looking at me!

    1. DuPz0r

      DuPz0r

      I prefer the Sega games growing up, they were more gritty and violent. The Nintendo games were good, but too soft and cutesy.

    2. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      Indeed, I don't do cutesy. And no I only ever played the first Flashback, games in those days were ruthlessly hard, not like today. Try completing Ecco the Dolphin, it's nigh on impossible.

    3. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      And I never had a Nintendo console, I went straight from Sega to Sony.

    4. Show next comments  9 more
  7. Shhhh, there's a guest in my profile. Keep still and wait until it's not looking then take it by surprise. *grabs a stick from the ground*

    1. The Mad Dooby

      The Mad Dooby

      *Throws Demon in cage* *Calls Massacre

    2. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      Hmm, that wasn't what I expected to happen but oh well, it's a result.

    3. The Mad Dooby

      The Mad Dooby

      *continues to crouch in sneak mode*

    4. Show next comments  9 more
  8. proud americany Cumdrop McTwatfuck

    1. Psy

      Psy

      Weird. In the McDonalds near me, that's actually on the menu

    2. Stoic Person Eater

      Stoic Person Eater

      Great Fantasy Football name.

    3. Psy

      Psy

      I'm sure it's allowed too

    4. Show next comments  9 more
  9. Commodore 64 is greater than Marney taking a shit after a particularly sloppy curry while jumping on the bandwagon and waving your tits at people as you go past in a cloud of dust.

  10. Demon, why'd you go and blow Oslo up and then shoot a load of people?

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. Massacre

      Massacre

      Demon, you were supposed to get mad at me so I could tell you not to "blow up" at me...

    3. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      He "exploded" in a fit of rage and "fired off" several scathing insults at random bystanders. I was trying to think of a joke involving "shooting some pool" for the people he shot in the water, but it'll probably be destined to fail. Meh.

    4. Post-traumatic amnesia

      Post-traumatic amnesia

      I "exploded" a few times in my sitting room while watching the carnage on TV. Not long after, I slipped in my explosions and fell, now I'm at hospital in the same room as some massacre survivors. Life is ironic, isn't it?

    5. Show next comments  9 more
  11. Had a vindaloo last night, ate it no problems. But now over 24 hours later my arse has started stinging - it's the ring of fire once again.

    1. DuPz0r

      DuPz0r

      This is a regular occurrence for me too. Curry night is all fine and dandy, but later the next evening is a trip to hell.

  12. C'mon you guize, we can get Marney down to -1000 tonight if we work furiously at it, someone bring the lube and we'll really get down and work at it.

    1. Massacre

      Massacre

      I'm debating whether to use my votes on Marney or Demon.

    2. The Mad Dooby

      The Mad Dooby

      whoops i thought you said -999 ill just fix that

    3. The Mad Dooby

      The Mad Dooby

      whoops i thought you said -999 ill just fix that

  13. I love it when you take a shit and it comes out nice and easy and breaks off in the right place so you don't even have to wipe your arse. At the other end of the spectrum, I hate it when it gets all stringy and any attempt to remove it with toilet paper causes it to become smooshed into your anal hair, why the fuck do we need hair around our arseholes anyway?! It defies logic and reason.

    1. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      Oui monsieur.

    2. Post-traumatic amnesia

      Post-traumatic amnesia

      You must make up your mind, you either are proud of your arse bushes or take action against it.

      In the first case you post pictures of it, in the latter case you post about your Brazilian wax experience.

    3. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      I've suddenly gone all shy and coy. *blushes and looks away*

    4. Show next comments  9 more
  14. Was watching that Human Centipede film last night and it made me quite horny. :D

    1. Massacre

      Massacre

      It's hard to say what position you want in a human centipede. All three positions get some sweet assplay, it comes down to whether you like to give receive, or both.

    2. narcolepsy

      narcolepsy

      ''yes, feed her, swallow it bitch''

    3. w5rules

      w5rules

      I think thats called a "murder boner"

    4. Show next comments  9 more
  15. I'm trying to think of a song name, the tune goes "buh-duh, duh duh duh, duh duh, duh, duh duh, buh-duh duh duh duh duh, buh-duh..." I can't remember if it was from the 70's or 80's, but i'm pretty sure it was either a synthesizer or a guitar with a wah wah pedal. Any eyed deers?

    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. Mattay

      Mattay

      foolin' - def leppard

    3. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      No. Try again.

    4. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      FUCK! I GOT IT! It was Dire Straits - Money for Nothing. From the very beginning there was a nagging doubt in my head it was a Dire Straits song. I FUCKING KNEW IT! Case closed people.

    5. Show next comments  9 more
  16. No we don't think he's insane, we're all insane here anyway so it'd make little difference. It's just that Demon's Norwegian - THAT'S what makes him freaky.

  17. Mmm, it tickles.

  18. I can't deny i've imagined those moist lips performing a multitude of indecent things upon my person while your beard gently caresses my scrotum. In a non-gay way though.

  19. It looks aiight to me. In a non-gay way though.

  20. Hey look it's you!... but as a cartoon!

  21. Ok, who's turn to hide is it now? Ready or not, here I come.

    1. Massacre

      Massacre

      *Walks up to Marney and turns his binoculars around the right way, places final brick in the wall*

    2. DuPz0r

      DuPz0r

      *Camps in a hut full of goat-women for 10 years*

    3. Handsome B Wonderful

      Handsome B Wonderful

      *Marries Dup and becomes his human shield*

    4. Show next comments  9 more
  22. Just did the roundest and smoothest shit ever. I really should upload a picture to fagbook 'cause i'm sure everybody will want to know.

    1. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      That's what this one was like, it was unbelievably smooth.

    2. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      Above the water line? Did you flush between "sessions" if not there's your problem.

    3. ViceMan

      ViceMan

      Did you avoid the splashback?

    4. Show next comments  9 more
  23. Aye aye surrr. *dodges falling nuclear warhead*

  24. Thanks in no small part to me, might I add...

    *dodges swinging axe*